[Memes eXodus] Kids Say the Dandiest Things

[altin topi]

Kids Say the Darndest Things

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when
a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark
naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my five-year-old shout
from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd
dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in
the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my
bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a
charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it
fell in the toilet a few days ago."

On the first day of school, a first grader handed his teacher a note from
his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not
necessarily those of his parents."
A woman was trying hard to get the catsup to come out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year old daughter
to
answer the phone. "It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother.
Then she added., "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now.
She's hitting the bottle."

I love the outdoors, and because of my passion for hunting and
fishing,my family eats a considerable amount of wild game. So much, in fact,
that one evening as I set a platter of broiled venison steaks on the dinner
table, my ten-year-old daughter looked up and said, "Boy, it sure would be
nice if pizzas lived in the woods."

A mother was showing her son how to zip up his coat. "The secret," she said,
"is to get the left part of the zipper to fit in the other side before you
try to zip it up." The boy looked at her quizzically... "Why does it have
to be a secret?"

When my daughter was three, we watched Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs for
the first time. The wicked queen appeared, disguised as an old lady selling
apples, and my daughter was spellbound. Then Snow White took a bite of the
poisoned apple and fell to the ground unconscious. As the apple rolled
away, my daughter spoke up. "See, Mom. She doesn't like the skin either."

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker
room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies
grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in
amazement and then asked, "What's the matter --haven't you ever seen a
little boy before?"





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